 My sister always knew she would have a quinceañera
I grew up in the suburbs of Mexico City, and by the time I was 12, I already knew I did not want a quince-años party. I could list several reasons why, but the main reason was simple: I was given a choice. Unlike my first communion at age 10, the quince ceremony and party was an option rather than an obligation. I could choose between the party, a new car, or a trip abroad. The car seemed most apt for my young age and early feminist position.
I was also 12 when my sister Tere had her quince-años celebration. Unlike myself, Tere always knew she would have a quinceañera party. She dreamed about it from childhood, and planned it her way, not completely adhering to traditions. And when she turned 15, my sister made her party-planning debut with outstanding results.
A celebration of self-power
First, she picked a provocative, green, flowery, halter-like dress. At that time in Mexico, the late ’70s, quinceañeras wore conservative white or beige dresses. After all, this was like an early rehearsal for a wedding. Tere’s party would be more a celebration of self-power, than the traditional coming-of-age event. Her dress was unconventional, hip, daring.
The planning began several months in advance, from choosing the church and picking the godparents to sending the invitations. However, most exciting for Tere was choosing her 14 maids or damas, who would not only precede her grand entrance to the church, but also would perform in the dance number she had planned.
The disco era
For months, Tere and her 14 maids, consisting of close friends and cousins, would gather at each other’s homes to rehearse Tere’s own choreography to the beat of "Stayin' Alive" by The Bee Gees. This was after all the era of disco music, and John Travolta’s icon character from the "Saturday Night Fever" movie was a hunk no quinceañera could resist. Especially this quinceañera, who had seen the movie at least 10 times. Perhaps this is why Tere chose not to have a chambelane at her party. There was no match for Travolta!
Tere’s quince took place on a Saturday evening in mid-July, in the large back yard of our suburban home. A party rental company handled the equipment and a catering service provided the 5-course menu. A hired DJ entertained the large group of friends and relatives that she invited. All the guests brought a present, as is customary. Tere received a gold cross from her godparents, which she proudly wore that day. She looked astonishing in her beautiful dress. Aunt Carmela, one of my dad’s sisters and a beauty expert, did her makeup and hair.
A traditional mass and not-so-traditional waltz
The 7 p.m. mass took place at a neighborhood church known for its modern architecture. The ceremony lasted 45 minutes, during which the priest talked about the responsibilities of the quinceañera as a Catholic adult woman. My sister sat by herself in front of the priest, with our parents and her godparents directly behind her.
After the mass, everybody came to our house for the party. Food and the drinks were served, and then Tere danced the traditional waltz with all the males at the party. One by one, each would tap the shoulder of the dancing partner of the moment and request a dance with Tere. That’s where tradition took on a modern twist: They waltzed to the rhythms of The Bee Gees’ "How Deep is Your Love". After this peculiar dance, Tere and her maids performed the "Stayin' Alive" piece, which was such a hit that the guests demanded they repeat it twice. Then it was time to cut the layered cake topped with the traditional quinceañera doll, and soon after Tere made her wishes. It was a wonderful time, and many guests partied till dawn.
The memory as fresh as yesterday
When I called my sister in Mexico a few days ago to tell her I was writing this story, she was thrilled, and the memories started flowing. It took me by surprise to hear her talk about that time in her life with such passion, almost as if it had been yesterday, as if she was still savoring the joy of her smashing quince.
When I asked her if she'd had a daughter, instead of two boys, would she have thrown her a quinceañera party, her answer was quick and precise, “If she wanted it, yes!”
It’s funny how events unfold. When my turn came 3 years later to fulfill my quinceañera dream, the family budget had suffered from an investment gone wrong. Instead of a new car, I received my mom’s old Datsun for my fifteenth birthday. I learned to drive in it, and through the years, that old car became part of my life. I have countless memories of my adventures in that car, memories every bit as cherished as Tere’s 15th birthday celebration.
It has been more than 2 decades since my sister’s quince. In retrospect, Tere enjoyed her quinceañera celebration as much as I was grateful not to have had one. To this day, Tere still takes pleasure in planning parties for herself and her family, and I still love driving!
Paz Bernal was born and raised in Mexico City. In 1990 she moved to New York City, N.Y., where she has lived ever since. She is a freelance writer, a translator, and private Spanish tutor. She also works as the executive assistant at a Manhattan-based human resources consulting firm. She currently lives in the Williamsburg section of Brooklyn, N.Y. |
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congratulations i hope u had a party dat wz of da hook!!!! 
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